# Chapter 33: Skinning the Flesh, Carving the Bone
The autumn wind was biting cold that night, and dark fog couldn't block the soft moonlight. Fan Xi was half-pushed, half-willingly pulled onto the bed by Man Cheng. It was less like being forced into something, more like surrendering with full intent.
Man Cheng lay exhausted on the bed, like a drowning person who had finally gotten a breath of fresh air, greedily inhaling the fragrance from the bedding and pillowcases.
Ah, that familiar sweet freshness! In the depths of his sealed memories, did he still long for those warm, caring hands? Had he once sought forgiveness and comfort from that person? Had he ever felt lost and bewildered for that person's sake?
Fan Xi reached out to touch his face, her fingertips meeting warm tears. Her heart trembled—those tears glistening in the darkness, for whom were they shed?
Man Cheng held her hand for a long while, then, as if speaking in a dream, softly said: "I love you."
---
The large army from the border of the Kingdom of Deng arrived at Qiuting to join forces with the Yuanliao army. Yet when it came time to attack the city, there were repeated delays. The Yuanliao commanding general had gone to Jiayun Pavilion a second time and never emerged again. For over ten days, Jin Lu couldn't figure out what kind of charm this Qiuting courtesan possessed—how had she made Man Cheng so reluctant to leave her Warming Pavilion even for a step?
In the first few days, Zhongshan had dismissed it with a laugh, but as time dragged on, no one could remain unmoved. Jin Lu was frantic with anxiety to attack Jingshui County. He repeatedly urged Zhongshan to drag Man Cheng back, but Zhongshan just frowned and shook his head.
Jin Lu couldn't help but worry, muttering to himself: "It seems Man Cheng is about to follow Qu Xue's path!"
Zhongshan snorted coldly: "Impossible."
"Why not?" Jin Lu coldly watched Zhongshan's expression, employing a provocation tactic: "With his overbearing personality, more than likely he'll bring that woman back to Yuanliao."
---
On the table and beside the pillows in the Warming Pavilion, there were sweets and candied dates everywhere. On the four walls hung paintings of flowers, birds, and beautiful women. The guqin and pipa were abandoned and cast aside. The air was filled with a faint fragrance, as a couple's whispered words drifted through.
The soft voices continued for an unknowable length of time, until the man said: "I'm not going anywhere anymore. I'll stay with you for a lifetime."
Then came a woman's soft sob.
Zhongshan entered Jiayun Pavilion, pushed aside the women who came to greet him, and walked straight up to the Warming Pavilion on the second floor's west side. He had enough regard for Man Cheng's face to lightly knock on the door and call out: "Man Cheng!"
The laughter inside stopped abruptly. After a moment, a slow voice came: "...Come in..."
Zhongshan pushed the door open and surveyed the room's disarray, frowning.
Man Cheng lay in a rocking chair, dressed in a goose-yellow brocade robe, his face deathly pale, his lips bloodless.
Zhongshan shot a furious glare at Fan Xi. The woman lowered her head, not uttering a sound.
Man Cheng released the hand he was holding, gentle as he said: "Go bring the sweet soup you made."
Fan Xi nodded and withdrew.
Zhongshan walked over, tightening Man Cheng's loose robe, and said flatly: "Have you had enough fun? The Deng army is getting impatient. They're clashing with our forces every day..."
Man Cheng leaned back in the rocking chair, eyes half-closed, seemingly intoxicated and lost to the world. Whether he'd heard a word Zhongshan said was impossible to tell.
Zhongshan's expression hardened. He asked: "What's wrong with you?" Receiving no answer from Man Cheng, a strange premonition rose in Zhongshan's heart. He used force to pull him upright and said sharply: "Come with me."
Man Cheng was like a rootless duckweed, dragged a few steps before stumbling and falling into Zhongshan's arms.
"Man Cheng!" Zhongshan held him tight, heartbroken and at a loss.
Man Cheng looked up, his half-lidded eyes dimmed by his lashes. Weakly, he said: "Zhongshan, would you also secretly ask me to harm others?"
A wave of sadness overcame Zhongshan. He was silent for a moment, but then felt Man Cheng's icy cheek press against his neck. His faint voice reached his ear—
"I want to spend the rest of my life with her. Right here."
Zhongshan's mouth fell open—whether from shock or fear, he couldn't tell. His legs went weak, and he sank to the floor clutching Man Cheng.
The man in his arms wasn't the Man Cheng he knew!
Zhongshan gritted his teeth and forced out a few words: "Don't you want to see Zhang Zhou anymore?" The moment these words left his mouth, he felt as if his heart had been sliced open by his own hand, the wounds bleeding profusely. But when he saw Man Cheng's expression, the pain became unbearable!
Man Cheng's whole body shuddered violently. His eyes flew wide open, as if looking at some incomprehensible monster. Past Zhongshan's shoulder, what did he see? His beautiful eyes churned with pain, confusion, despair—and what else? It was reluctance, the gut-wrenching pulling that refused to let go!
Zhongshan regretted his words immediately. He cradled Man Cheng's face and kissed him desperately.
Why did I have to mention that name? Let him forget. No matter what method—make him forget quickly! I want to destroy him. I want to leave him so weak he can no longer resist me, so powerless to return to that person! No matter the method—knife? Poison?
Or else, let's just die together!
Poison?
Zhongshan jolted awake just as "clang!" went the door, pushed open. Fan Xi stood at the entrance holding a bowl of sweet soup.
Zhongshan's eyes blazed with fury as he roared at her: "What have you been giving Man Cheng?"
"Clatter..." The delicate bowl hit the ground and shattered into pieces.
It was then that Man Cheng snapped back to his senses. He stared at that white silhouette backlit in the doorway, unable to clearly make out her features for a long moment.
"General Xia!" Fan Xi fell to her knees and scrambled forward, crying: "I only wanted to keep you by my side! I've already reduced the dosage! General, I love you, I—"
Zhongshan was fuming, about to curse her when Man Cheng's throat convulsed and he spat out a mouthful of blood.
"Man Cheng!"
"General!" Fan Xi screamed and rushed over as well.
Zhongshan held Man Cheng with one arm while shoving Fan Xi away ruthlessly with the other. His brows shot up as he bellowed: "Get lost!"
After spitting out that blood, Man Cheng's mind cleared significantly. He gazed calmly at that woman, gradually—slowly—seeing her more clearly: her willow eyebrows and apricot eyes, her bright red thin lips, that face like rain-soaked pear blossoms—stunningly beautiful.
But it wasn't her.
Man Cheng gave a cold laugh. From between his teeth, he squeezed out two words: "Come here."
Fan Xi's whole body went cold with fear. She backed away repeatedly. In the eyes of the man who had kept her company day and night for these dozen days, she saw something she had never seen before—that gleam was sinister, bursting with fierce killing intent.
"Xianrong Street?" Man Cheng said casually, using that dreamy voice from that night, gently: "What a lovely name..."
---
The Lord Protector General transferred half of the Prestige Army to the command of Left General Qingduan, Right General Wu Lianheng, and Vanguard General Gao Xuan. Combined with the Wu Tao Army and the Deng forces, the army packed up and left Qiuting, intending to strike first at Jingshui County.
Zhongshan emerged from camp, his expression gloomy. He gave Wu Lianheng some instructions, then walked up to Jin Lu and said: "You all go ahead. As soon as his drug addiction wears off, I'll catch up immediately."
Jin Lu glanced at the general's tent of the Prestige Army—no guards within a dozen meters—and asked: "He's asleep?"
Zhongshan's expression was haggard. He only nodded.
Jin Lu noticed the deep bite marks on Zhongshan's hands—several of them. He shook his head with a rueful smile: This poor fool had probably been scratched and bitten nearly all over by Man Cheng over these past few days.
"Zhongshan..." Jin Lu spoke from the heart: "That person in there, he's not human. One day when he's not in a good mood, he won't spare any old feelings. He'll kill you in an instant without blinking. Is your devotion really worth it? I'm begging you, don't sink any deeper!"
Zhongshan thanked him coolly for his concern, but his mind was clearly elsewhere. He gave a perfunctory bow, turned, and went back into his tent.
Jin Lu watched his retreating figure, sighing endlessly: How could there be someone in this world so blindly infatuated?
---
The thundering sound of thousands upon ten thousands of soldiers running jolted awake the person curled into a ball in the tent's corner. He shuddered, reaching blindly, trying to grasp something.
"Ah—"
The guards stationed a dozen meters away all felt their hair stand on end. How had he woken so quickly?!
What was tearing at his skin inch by inch? What was chiseled into his very bones? What was raking through his brain like a blade?!
When helpless terror struck, who was it that immediately held him tight? Who whispered comfort in his ear?
"Zhang Zhou—Zhang Zhou—"
The pain was unbearable! Whose skin did his nails sink into? Whose blood filled his mouth, sweet and metallic?
"Zhang Zhou... Zhang Zhou... Zh... Zhang..."
I can't bear to hurt you. I can't bear to let you suffer so. Zhang Zhou, what should I do? So you've been hating me all along, hating that I'm not a woman, hating that I'm not a woman! How... how could you do this to me... What should I do? I hate myself, hate myself so much...
So much that I wish I could just die...
If I die, you'll be free...
You find me so disgusting that even being near me makes you sick. Why are you still holding me then? Let go. Let me... just die.
You despise me so much... why am I still alive?
"Zhang Zhou... don't, don't abandon me... I'm begging you, I'm begging you..."
The voice faded, grew hoarse...
The person holding him, covered in wounds from head to toe, felt a pain in his heart less than one-ten-thousandth of the other man's anguish...
---
That night in the Ruyi Western Palace of Yuanliao City, heart-wrenching screams echoed through the air. The inside of Rongji Garden was thick with a sickening smell of blood. The imperial physicians who emerged from the inner chamber one by one had faces ashen gray, their hands trembling. Once in the outer hall, they fell to their knees and kowtowed repeatedly without end.
A single person sat in the hall. Listening to the blood-curdling cries from the inner chamber, he clenched his fists tight, his jaw set, his brows twisted in boundless agony.
The royal carriage arrived outside the garden with no servants to announce it. Through the chaos, Xiuyi rushed in first. Upon entering the outer hall, she demanded: "Zhang Zhou! What happened?!"
Zhang Zhou said nothing. Peng Hong swept his gaze over the physicians kneeling throughout the room and demanded: "What's going on?"
One physician trembled as he spoke: "The Queen has suffered a miscarriage..."
Xiuyi's legs buckled. She caught the arm of a chair and sat down heavily, tears falling: "Zhang Zhou, what happened to her? Wasn't she fine just yesterday?"
Maid servants carried basins of bloody water in and out, panic-stricken. Xiuyi nearly vomited, leaning against Peng Hong as she sobbed.
Ying Shan stumbled out, carrying a square silver tray. On it sat a tall, intricately carved jade bowl covered with a cloth. She knelt before Zhang Zhou, raising the tray above her head, her voice thick with tears: "Your Majesty, the child had already formed. Do you wish to see?"
Zhang Zhou felt fury and grief surge through him. He reached up and gripped the base of the jade bowl, the pain so intense it was almost unbearable. He didn't have the courage to lift the cloth. He withdrew his hand, gritted his teeth, and spoke two words: "Take it away."
The pain of skinning flesh and carving bone—death itself was no worse than this...